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Paddick: Ex-Boyfriend Beat Me

Liberal Democrat candidate for London Mayor, Brian Paddick has spoken out about his experiences of coming out to the world - and his wife - and how he was beaten up by a former lover.

In extracts from his forthcoming autobiography, Line Of Fire, currently being serialised in The Mail on Sunday, Brian tells of his journey of facing up to his sexuality and when he first realised he wasn't straight.

"I first realised I was gay as a ten-year-old Wolf Cub on a day trip to a scout camp in Essex," he says, and adds that his attraction to a 15 year old Scout made him feel he wasn't "normal."

He tells of his first sexual experience when he first joined the police force, and on meeting and befriending another gay officer Phil and his boyfriend, his first experience of a gay club - Monday nights at the Hippodrome.

"I was incredibly nervous. I had a lot to learn," he says.

"I had no idea there were so many gay men in London, let alone in one club. I was finding it increasingly hard to continue living a lie and agonised over what to do until a particular incident made up my mind for me."

While watching the film My Beautiful Launderette, his wife's positive reaction to the gay relationship in the film made him realise he should come out to her.

"There never is a right moment for these sorts of life-changing revelations. We were having dinner in a Chinese restaurant one evening in 1988 and I was talking to Mary about Phil."

"Mary looked at me and said casually: “You'll think I'm being very stupid . . . but you don't have any inclinations in that direction, do you?”

"I looked at my wife - and I did not have to say anything. Tears welled up in her eyes," he says.

He also speaks of meeting Frenchman James Renolleau in 1995, with whom he went on to have a "tempestuous relationship."

"James was very jealous, possessive and, occasionally, violent," Brian says. "On one occasion he stormed out after an argument and I ran after him, calling for him to come back."

"When I caught up with him he wheeled round, floored me with a punch and started kicking me while I lay in the gutter."

"My main thought as I lay there was how embarrassing it would be if a passer-by called the police and I, a senior police officer, was found to be the victim of domestic violence," he says in the book.

After a further incident in 2000, the pair parted, but in 2002 he heard from James that he had sold the story of their relationship to The Mail on Sunday, which included an incorrect claim that they had smoked cannabis together.

Eventually the story was published, and another followed from a former fiancee Fiona Pilborough portraying Brian as a "religous nut."

His former wife Mary told her story to another paper saying what a "wonderful person" he was and that he did did not deserve to be moved from my job as Commander overseeing policing in the London Borough of Lambeth.

The Metropolitan Police Authority eventually decided not to go ahead with misconduct proceedings against Brian and he sued The Mail on Sunday for the false stories and settled the case out of court.

"Who would have thought things would have turned out the way they did with this paper?" Brian says.

Listen to our interview with Brian by going to the Downloads section of GaydarNation.

Brian Paddick's autobiography Line Of Fire is out on 25 March published by Simon & Schuster.

Author: Joanne Oatts

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